Jacqueline C. Thomas - Romance Novelist

jackiecthomas

Quarantine Stories: A Creative Exercise

by 2 Comments

Hello all, sorry I disappeared for a bit, but with the state of the world, I think it is excusable. As the global pandemic rages on, and I begin my fourth week of self-quarantine. I have learned two things about myself. First, stress and creativity do not go hand in hand for me. When I am really stressed creativity turns off. The second thing I have learned how unusual circumstances can lead to interesting story prompts. This brings me to Quarantine Stories. Right now we are living through a global event, time will be measure as before and after the pandemic. All of this being said, I want to say thank you so much to all of the front line workers, doctors, nurses, law enforcement, package carriers, mailmen and mailwomen etc. Bravery is stocking shelves, delivering mail, and caring for the sick without proper PPE these days. Thank you to these stoic individuals who are keeping the basic necessities functioning.

As I said earlier, the thought of quarantine started to percolate my creativity. I thought of fun, heartbreaking, and awkward scenarios where characters are effected by quarantine. I had this thought two weeks ago and my brain gnawed on the idea. So the more I thought about it, I think this might be an interesting creative exercise to write a series of very short stories where the only rule of the story is that the characters must be stuck together in quarantine. The quarantine rules do not have to match current laws set by global governments, there is a bit of creativity here. I do not mean for this to be a disrespectful exercise in any way. Like most of us globally, I am looking for a way to fill my time. My goal is one story a week. We’ll see how it goes.

So let’s begin:

Quarantine Story #1: April 8, 2020 (Mark & Gemma)

Gemma woke as Mark’s arm pulled her in closer to him. She opened her eyes not believing it was morning again. She surveyed the yellow walls of the studio apartment, from the futon where she and Mark had spent all weekend in each other’s arms. She rolled over slightly and his eyes opened.

“You’re awake,” Mark said, his voice still raspy from sleep.

“Mmm, I am. I need to get moving or I am going to miss my flight.”

“Nope, I’m not letting you go, you’re my prisoner,” he joked.

“Well, I can come to be your prisoner next time I am in St. Louis. I need to go home to England.

Gemma watched Mark’s playful smile pierce with a pang of sadness, and she felt remorse for it. This is insanity she told herself. She followed Mark home after a wild night out and proceeded to have the wildest sexual experience of her life thus far. They had only left the bed to eat and shower. They binge-watched old kung-fu movies, both finding a true fan in each other. Gemma sat up and looked for her phone. She had not checked it since Saturday morning. Her job was high stress and she knew everything could wait for one weekend of fun.

Mark propped up as he watched Gemma walk around the small apartment, naked. He found her boldness and confidence incredibly sexy. He could not pull his eyes away from her petite frame, that was curvy in all of the best places. It didn’t hurt that her black hair swayed across her back as she walked towards her purse. Mark tried not to salivate at the thought of sleeping with Gemma one last time. As she dug in her purse for her phone he got off of the futon and pulled a t-shirt over his head.

“At least let me make you breakfast first,” he said as he walked over to the tiny kitchenette.

He poured began to make a pot of coffee as he realized Gemma had not answered him.

“Gemma?”

She still ignored him. He turned around and saw her standing still naked as she held the phone in one hand scrolling through her phone and her other hand over her mouth. Reading her face, Mark knew something awful had happened. He walked over to her.

“Are you okay,” he asked.

Hearing the concern in his voice, triggered her attention.

“My flight’s been cancelled. The borders have been closed. I…”

“What? Why? What happened?”

“It’s this virus. All travel has been shut down. My mum and dad are back home in the UK, my auntie, and friends.”

“Does it say how long?”

“I don’t know I haven’t gotten that far yet.”

“Here, let me look,” Mark said as he turned around looking for his own phone.

“Turn the telly on,” Gemma instructed.

Mark grabbed the remote on the nightstand and clicked it on. President Malcolm stood at the podium, in the middle of a speech. Gemma came over and sat next to where Mark sat, both transfixed by the American President declaring the borders of the United States were now closed, as globally travel was banned due to a rapidly spreading global pandemic. Gemma reached back and pulled the blanket from the futon around her. Mark wrapped his arm around not sure if it was to comfort her or himself. As the President concluded Gemma looked down at her phone.

“I have to call parents, would that be okay?”

“Of course, I’ll shower to give you some privacy.”

Mark stood, and realized he should probably call his own family. He grabbed his phone and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind himself. With his apartment being a true studio, the bathroom was the only enclosed room, where one could give and get privacy. He turned on the shower, hoping the noise would block out his own calls home. He talked to his parents who were isolated on their farm in rural Illinois and were prepared. They urged him to head to the farm, and it sounded like a good idea, but he wasn’t sure yet. He wasn’t going to just leave Gemma in his apartment.

He showered in record time and put a towel around his waist as he walked out of the bathroom, hoping he wouldn’t disturb Gemma. She sat on the futon her head in her hands. Mark walked over softly and sat down next to her. She could smell the scent of his shampoo and could feel the moisture evaporating off of his skin.

“Were you able to get ahold of your parents and your family,” he asked.

“Where am I going to go. Your? President said that the borders are closed for the next six weeks at minimum. I’ve called my hotel and they are requesting guests check out. I guess they called over the weekend to alert me to this, but the one weekend I put my phone away, the world ends.”

She wiped a tear from her cheek as Mark stood up.

“You’re going to come home with me. My family owns a farm just across the state line in Illinois, in Berlin. It’s tiny, they have a big farm with plenty of room. I called them when you made your calls and they invited me, us, out.”

“You told your family about me?”

“Not exactly, but you are welcome to come along.”

“I’m a stranger to them.”

“You’re not to me. I know this really isn’t the time for this, considering all that is going on but I like you, I mean, I really like you. That being said you don’t have to feel the same way about me, I know how nuts that sounds as we’ve only just met. The offer stands no matter your feelings for me.”

Gemma wiped both of her cheeks. There was something about her curled up in his blanket, upset and afraid, that compelled him to lean down and kiss her but he resisted the urge. She looked up at him, with her piercing green eyes, and tear-stained cheeks.

“I couldn’t it’s rude.”

“Not here, I promise you. The city is going to get nuts, you have nowhere else to go. I’d offer to let you stay in the studio but I don’t have food here, and I don’t think it will be safe. Please come with me?”

Gemma sat considering her options. She hadn’t said it but she felt the same way about Mark. She chewed her bottom lip, thinking through her options, while she looked at the perfect specimen of a man standing in front of her. The night she had found his dark curly mop of hair adorable the night she had met him, and his chocolate-brown eyes seemed to melt her insides in all of the best ways. He was clean-shaven on the night they had met, but he now had the beginnings of a beard. His muscular build reassured her that he could protect her in the new reality they had woken up to.

“Are you sure it won’t be an imposition?”

“No way. My parents would be thrilled. Here I can give you the address that way you can tell your family where you’ll be if that helps?”

Mark bent down looking at her squarely.

“My mother’s name is Betty and my father’s name is George. They’ve lived in Berlin their whole lives. The family farm has been in my family for three generations now. I am their only son, my sister Carina lives in Florida with her husband. She is staying down there to be near her in-laws. You’ll actually be doing me a favor, my parents are almost in their seventies. It would be nice to have someone my own age to talk to. I promise you it is the safest place on the planet, there is almost a three-mile square perimeter of corn around the entire farm.”

Mark reached up and tucked a long piece of her bangs behind her ear.

“All right. Thank you. Are you sure?”

“Absolutely. I promise you we’ll be safe there.”

Gemma stood up and began to look for her clothes. She dressed in Friday night’s club attire that she had worn to Mark’s apartment. Her bags had been packed up and were waiting at the concierge the hotel had instructed her.

“I’m sorry but can we please go to the hotel for my bags before we leave town?”

“Of course.”

Mark zipped the suitcase that sat on the futon and pulled it off of onto the floor, the metal wheels of it clicking on the wood floor.

“Ready? We’d better get on the road, so we are in our shelter place by 5 pm. as the President said.

Gemma nodded that she was as Mark pulled the suitcase behind him. He reached out his hand for hers and she took it as they walked out of the apartment into the unknown.

 

If you liked this story, check out the Quarantine Stories book with 5 never before published stories.

A Spot for Inspiration

by Leave a Comment

A roadside seafood restaurant in Malibu.

I was walking on the shore just two short weeks ago along the Malibu coast in California, at my happiest to be in such a gorgeous place. As I walked, the surf tickling my toes, and the waves crashed on the rocks, I glanced over at the large beach homes that hugged the coast. I was struck with a spark, an idea…inspiration. An idea came to me for a book, a really good idea. I’ve been thinking about the idea ever since, but the idea of inspiration and place has also been on my mind.

Meanwhile, I have made what feels, like a massive career transition within those past two weeks as well. I left my former job and took a job in Chicago. I don’t live in the city, I reside within the commuter-belt, albeit a very far edge. So last week, I grabbed my high heels and stepped into my new life, doing a job that I have worked an entire career to get to. I won’t lie, it feels good, no great, to be here. I also know that although I have “made it” to this level, my work must be worthy for now and for forwarding advancement.

As exciting as this transition is, my new opportunity has put back downtown Chicago again. Chicago is my home city. When I travel the world and people ask me where I am from, I reply, “I’m from Chicago,” even though I don’t actually reside within the city. The first day as I stepped off of the commuter train, out of the station,  and out onto the street, I thought about all of those who came before me and all of those who will come after me. Then I thought about my characters, doing the same thing I am doing, going about their daily lives in this amazing city.

So much of my work is set in Chicago, because it is the city that I love, and it is the city that I know. As I was walking to catch the train home yesterday, I walked in the exact footsteps where Ben and Rachel from McKinley Park had their first date. I imagined them walking under the EL on the hot summer night. I couldn’t help but smile, genuinely smile. I am sure the others on the street if they even noticed wondered why this crazy woman wore a big smile but I didn’t care. As I walked further, my newest book has a scene set in the State Street Macy’s, I thought of the two characters as I walked past. Chicago is a rich setting, and I think it is why I use it so much in my work.

I am a firm believer that place directly impacts not just where a story is set but the writer too. I remarked to my husband while we were in LA a few weeks ago, that one would almost have to reside in LA for an extended period of time to accurately write the area. Sure writing a trope of LA is easy, but if you really wanted to richly set a work there… In my opinion, you’d have to go there and stay for some time. For reference, when I mean LA, I am talking about the greater LA area. It is so vastly different from the coast, to Anaheim, to Santa Anna and into the mountains, you’d have to be there to accurately describe the setting.

This past fall I took a trip for a long girls weekend down to New Orleans. At the time I was reading the book Fat Tuesday by Sandra Brown, which is set there. I picked up the book before I travelled thinking it would be interesting to read a book about a place I had never been and was soon to travel to. The experience of reading a book set in downtown New Orleans, while walking the streets the characters had, was a decadent experience. There was so much more to see, hear, smell, taste that added a rich velvety layer of complexity to Brown’s story. Granted I can’t travel to every book setting but the experience stuck with me.

When I first started writing romance, then reading it – yeah I know I got that backwards, but it’s the way it happened, I read a series by Christine Feehan. The setting for some of the stories were set in the bayous and swamps in Lousiana, as a home base for the characters. I read an interview with her about her research for the books, and she talked about spending time there for the purposes of book research. She discussed how the beauty of place resonated with her. When I read her books set in the bayou, they felt detailed in a way that you know she had been there. She describes place so well, and I would argue that the place in itself was an inspiration and a character in the series.

The more I write the more I learn. It used to annoy me to no end when writers would drone on about “the process.” I naively thought to myself, just sit down and write. How time has a way of teaching each of us. Place is important, whether reading or writing, it matters. I get it now. I am grateful to walk in the setting of my own work every day now.

Book Review Time

by Leave a Comment

I love to read but it feels like a guilty pleasure when I actually get to do it with Grad School wrapping up. I had the pleasure of reading two extraordinary books recently, as well as re-reading my first book as a result of #KissPitch and being the worst beta reader ever for my dear sister who has written the most amazing collection of travel stories. It may not seem like a lot but it actually is a lot of reading. So, check out what this romance author has been reading.

 

Three Women by Lisa Taddeo

I received this book as a birthday present from my husband. He saw the British press had not stopped raving about it since its release, and thought it would interest me. He was not wrong. Three Women is a work of non-fiction. Taddeo follows three American women and their journies with sexuality, a woman who has an affair, to another woman who is in an open marriage, to the teenager who has a sexual relationship with her high school teacher. As a romance author, what induces love, sexuality and lust is always of interest to me. I picked up this book as a character study but soon realized I would be selling it desperately short to approach it that way.

From the first page, with its gripping honesty, I could not pully myself away. The stories are heartbreaking and TRUE. Each story is unique and thought-provoking but the one story that particularly resonated with me was the story of Lena, a married mother, who had an affair with a high school fling. Her first sexual experience is heartbreaking, and she marries a man who doesn’t seem interested in physical affection. Despite her best efforts, to entice her husband, he is simply unwilling- even repulsed by the idea. I couldn’t help but wonder if he had his own traumatic sexual backstory. (I am not saying that those who are asexual have trauma).

Lena talks about craving a man’s touch, and she finds it in the arms of a high school boyfriend, who is married as well. I found myself rooting for them, even though they were both married. It is heartbreaking and beautiful to see Lena’s struggle.

With so much amazing work out there to read and our non-stop news cycle, it seems that not much sticks with us for very long, but this book will stick with me forever. The brutal, beautiful, heartbreaking honesty in which these women tell their stories is incredible. I literally could not put this book down!

 

American Queen by Sierra Simone

 

While out in Los Angeles last month I made sure to stop in The Ripped Bodice in Studio City, California, a romance bookstore. While I was there the cashier highly recommend this book to me, making sure to inform me that this one is more erotica than romance. I like a good steamy read every now and then so I purchased it. The premise of this work of fiction, follows Greer, the privileged granddaughter of a former Vice President, her love interest Maxen Colchester and his best friend, and current VP Embry Moore. I’ve never read a book by Simone so I wasn’t sure what to expect. The opening two paragraphs of this book are a master class on how to start a book. I was hooked from the start!

I started reading this one on the flight home from L.A., a red-eye flight, where the two travellers on either side of me slept. I am not ashamed that I read romance and erotica, but let me tell you, this one made me blush! At one point during the flight, I had to put the book down, it was that steamy- my eyes had third-degree burns! From start to finish the sex scenes in this book, leave NOTHING to the imagination. It left me, who is not prudish at all, slightly uncomfortable.

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!     

Greer falls for Ash or Maxen and they begin a sub/ dom relationship. I have read several books with this sort of sexual play and my normal reaction is like, “eh, okay.” The relationship in this book bothered me more than most of the other books in the genre that I have read. Greer is sexually inexperienced and is suddenly eager to please Ash at his beck and call. I just don’t get it. I am not passing judgement on sexual interests in any way! The whole sub/ dom thing is so not my jam. At one point Ash whips Greer with a belt and she talks about how it hurts so good. All I could think to myself was, “if someone hits me with a belt, I am going to grab it from them and hit them with it!” Yes, I know I am missing the point here. I just find myself asking, where is the line between violence and sexuality?

Then, we find out that Greer looses her virginity to Embry, who is Ash’s best friend after Ash breaks her heart one night. The whole scene where she loses her virginity is hot- unrealistic, but hot. So now we have a perfect love triangle between Ash, Greer and Embry. I really wondered where Simone was going with it. Later on in the book, Greer finds out that Ash and Embry have a sexual relationship too! Woah, everyone is sleeping with each other! Greer finds this out in the most awkward way too. The book culminates on Ash and Greer’s wedding night, where they invite Embry in to essentially be a thruple.

A few years ago I had an interesting conversation with a therapist about different types of relationships. At the time this therapist was treating a woman who was in a relationship with two men. Together, the two men and she had made a thruple or a couple of three. The therapist told me about some of the research they had done on the topic and the one thing that came up time and again- it never works out in the long run. All I could think to myself was that their relationship will never work! Sure it might be hot, and convenient for now, but down the road, things are going to get messy.

The last scene in the book, the wedding night, I found more thought-provoking than sexy. Greer asks her new husband and his best friend, Embry to sleep together in front of her before they turn their attentions to her. The culmination of this wedding night ends with the two men making a Greer sandwich. This made me wonder, would anyone want a wedding night like this? Am I a square? I don’t know. Again, I am not judging as long as all involved parties are consenting adults.

I think for me as a romance writer, the set up was there for a sexy, heartfelt love story between Ash and Greer, but somewhere it jumped the rails. There is so much with this book, incest, threesomes, sub-dom, gay sex, you name it. If you rated hotness on a scale, this book would be nuclear, but I would argue at the expense of what could have been a great love story.

Adventures in #KissPitch Land

by Leave a Comment

 

Normally I try to post at least once a week, but I am in the midst of a transition, I have taken a new job, one that I have worked my whole career towards. I also finished the book I’ve been writing over the holidays. I love that story where the love interests rescue each other. So much hurt, and baggage and two people have to make the decision to look past all of the distractions and just love each other… swoon! Anyway, with a job transition, finishing up grad school, and finishing a novel, life has been BUSY! So busy in fact, that I almost missed #KissPitch, the Twitter pitch contest for romance writers.

I saw the announcement of the annual pitch contest two days before Valentine’s Day, the day of the event. How perfect is that, a romance pitching event on Valentine’s Day! I woke on the morning of Valentine’s Day still unsure of if I was going to pitch or not. I rolled over as my alarm clock went off and asked my husband if I should pitch or not. His response was tepid. As I got ready for the day I thought more about it, and thought maybe I should pitch one of the other finished books that I haven’t tried to query yet. I purposed this idea to my husband, who initially said,” yes, pitch the one with the PR lady.” He meant the book, What Was Meant to Be. It is the story of two best friends who have chemistry, ignore it while moving on with life and then through tragedy, can no longer ignore the obvious. It also has one of my most favorite scenes that I have ever written in it.

I thought about it and thought about the other finished works I had that I could pitch and my very first novel, that I rewrote over the fall, was ready to go too. It had been edited, although not professionally (confession moment!) I thought I would put that one out there too. I adore that book not only because it was the first one I ever wrote, but the male love interest, David is DREAMY! Sailing in Silicon Valley is about a young woman who falls in love with her brother’s older boss, David.

So as I drove to work I crafted my pitches and my strategy. The contest ran form 9 am EST to 9 pm.EST. Part of my strategy is to have my pitch retweeted as many times as possible, the goal being that it is seen more. I also wanted to retweet fellow romance authors who were pitching on the same day. I figure the more romance out there, the better, am I right? Spread the love folks. Anyway, I sent my first pitch out at 9:30 am, for What was Meant to Be, here it is:

“Everything changes in one tragic moment for best friends Gabe and Lis. Clinging to each other to make it through the aftermath, Friendship turns to passion, then love but a lot stands in the way of their happily ever after, like her absentee husband. #KissPitch #CR”

I sent out my second pitch around noon, for Sailing in Silicon Valley, here it is:

“Naomi is visiting her brother for the summer in Silicon Valley when she falls hard for her brother’s sexy, older boss. David isn’t expecting to fall in love with his most brilliant employee’s little sister. What begins as a steamy fling turns into so much more. #KissPitch #CR”

I had moderate success with both pitches and watched eagerly as those who meant well liked my pitches. In a Twitter pitch contest, only agents are supposed to like the pitch, supporters who want to be helpful are supposed to retweet instead. Each time I’d get a notification from Twitter that someone had liked one of the pitches, I’d eagerly hop on and investigate. By 3 pm. I had felt dejected. I thought about recrafting the pitches and sending them back out, you’re allowed to do up to four pitches in total. I thought about it and decided to just retweet what I had already put out there myself, and get on with my day. I did one last check-in at the end of the day and saw I had another like on the Sailing in Silicon Valley… and wait for it…. it was from a real AGENT!! AHHHHHHH! After I stopped doing the happy dance around my office I began to investigate the agent, it turns out I had pitched a different book to her almost a year ago to the day! This agent is like my dream agent.

I called my husband and told him this amazing news, not quite believing it myself. After the elation waned, fear set in, real fear. I had not had the manuscript professionally copyedited yet. I can envision my fellow authors reading this, screaming at the screen, “Then why did you pitch it!?!?” I had a plan, to run through it again, hire a copyeditor on Upwork and have it in the agent’s inbox before Monday. I only had to submit the first 50 pages after all, and a query letter. All Valentine’s Day evening plans went out the window, I had work to do. Dreams don’t come to you, you have to go out there and get them! So roses, steak dinner, romantic movie, all of it had to wait, I had work to do. I put the first fifty pages up on UpWork and shortly got a rejection for the project due to the adult content. It has a love scene in it. Panicked that I wasn’t going to be able to have someone else look at it, I reached out to my best friend. She was a senior assistant for the state government for her entire career, and nothing gets past her. She told me to send her the pages and she’d turn them around quickly too.

By Sunday morning I had my query letter done, and the first fifty pages of the manuscript had been scoured. I submitted them. Submitting a query is like no other experience I can think of. There’s excitement, adrenaline, reassurance, hope… then you hit send.. then comes fear, angst, nervousness… It is the worst. Meanwhile, I continued to pour over the book. My poor husband looked at me wondering if we were ever going to have a real Valentine’s day celebration. Aside from checking my inbox relentlessly, we did have our date. Word came on Monday morning of a polite decline from the agent. I knew that it was unlikely that this might be “it” my big break, but I still hoped.

So, that was an adventure and a learning experience for sure. I learned that one had better have work ready to be sent asap when pitching. I also learned that my writing has improved as I re-read through the re-written manuscript. I think I may table my current manuscript making the query rounds and might try this book instead. If it doesn’t work, there’s always another one waiting in the wings.

New Year, Better Me

by Leave a Comment

Caffeine and Pilates

Whew, the holidays are finally behind us and I don’t know about you, but I am glad that they are over. Don’t get me wrong, it was a great season filled with family, friends and indulgence, but I am grateful for life to return to “normal.” Between my last post and now, my husband travelled for work for ten days, big things happened at work, I got sick, the hubs got sick, my daughter got sick, we had Christmas, New Years and then my last semester of grad school started, and I found pilates. Whew, I’m exhausted just typing that all out, but the best part is I started a new book in the midst of all of that! Yes, you read that correctly, I started a new book.

The idea came about after I started NaNoWriMo this past year. I dove headfirst into a story that, three chapters in.. I hated. I was stuck. Normally I’d force myself to push thought but even I didn’t like my characters, and I created them. I knew it was time to abandon ship. Then when it looked like all hope of a book was lost, the new idea floated by and I lept. While the new book is still a romance, this project is different from anything I have written before. One character does not rescue the other, or fall more in love and chase the other, the characters in this project rescue each other, and I love that! It is much more difficult to write for sure, and I hope it will be worth it.

Normally, I write fast, when an idea is smouldering away- like I can write 60K words in eight or nine days! My average time to write a novel is about three weeks, and that is taking into account my fulltime job and finishing up my Master’s degree, not to mention being a wife and a mother. This book, I have been writing since late November. Yes, you read that correctly, late November. It is not that the book is massive or some giant epic, it’s that life has been busy. It is also why there’s been such a pause in between blog posts. I’ve written when I’ve either had that time or made the time. I haven’t pushed so hard, and I am seeing the benefit of not, I think of it like giving the story the time to breathe. I have given myself days to thing about plot and character, and really take the time to build a richer context.

I am just around what I think will be the half-way point in it and I really love the characters. They’re real and raw and looking for an anchor in the storms of their lives. I have also found a great album that I have been writing this book to. It is the album entitled Delta by Mumford and Sons. I like their music, but I would not consider myself a massive fan. I heard the song Woman on the album and I was swept away by the emotion of it while I wrote. I knew this was the song that embodied my characters. If I am ever lucky enough to be published, aside from my amazing support network, I want to dedicate the book to the band that sung me through.. through writer’s block, heartbreak, happiness, plot holes and ultimately a beautiful love story.

I am really enjoying writing again. I have made healthier choices in the new year as well. I took up a pilates reformer class, which left me wondering where this magic has been all of my life. I find it to be an amazing workout, but more importantly, it is time set aside for myself where I cannot concentrate on anything else other than my body in that moment which is a treat in this day and age. I also completed dry January, where one does not drink alcohol for the entire month of January. This too was a great experience, and as we roll into February, I am happy to keep this up. I find more mental clarity and just feel better. I am also paying more attention to what I am eating, making sure I am eating lots of fruits and veggies, and sweets in moderation. I am feeling better than I have in a long time, and it has been rewarding creatively too, over the past two weeks. I have had two book ideas in the past two weeks. Both warrant loosely planning out.

The new year is out to a good start so far, fingers crossed that it only improves from here.

My Writing Year of 2019

by Leave a Comment

 

This has been an interesting year writing-wise. I came into 2019 having just finished three completed novels, in fact, I finished the last one on December 22nd of 2018. I came into the year on a creative hot-streak! There was a lot of change for me personally last year too, a career change, followed by another one in short succession. I would’ve thought that change would’ve stifled the creative process but it didn’t. I couldn’t write fast enough. The creative juices were flowing, they were overflowing!

I came into this year without any expectations for writing, other than, I would continue to write. With six completed works under my belt I wanted to change direction, I wanted to find an agent. As I read everything I could get my hands on about finding an agent, one thing that became clear was that I needed to build a platform- hence the birth of this website. I set to crafting the perfect query letter and all I can say is I had a lot to learn, and probably still do if I am being honest. I put my head down, got to researching and started querying. Let me just say for those of you who have never done this- it is rough.

My writing comes from somewhere deep inside of me. That being said, when I reach out to an agent for representation, I am putting my work out there, and it is no longer mine and mine alone. I have to be open to changes that will come to the story and the characters along the way, it is no longer my own fiefdom, that is terrifying. There is also the emotional response of hoping it’s good enough and that my writing isn’t a joke. Bottom line, querying is an emotional landmine, but that being said, it is a necessary process. So far, querying has had its ups and downs but it has also helped me grow as a person. I have had to learn to handle rejection in a way that I never have before- it’s humbling but good. As 2019 rolls to a close, I am still currently seeking representation, but I am not deterred. I am emboldened to keep going. I believe through and through that, I have to work for the things I want in life.

Aside from querying, I did write this year. I wrote McKinley Park and published it a chapter at a time on this very blog. In fact, it was this blog that prompted the completion of McKinley Park. As I wrote on the McKinley Park page, I had started the story awhile back but had gotten stuck and had shelved it. I knew if I said I would finish it here on the blog, that the public pressure would force me to complete it. I was right! Writing a book and publishing it a chapter at a time, in a new genre, what could go wrong? McKinley Park stretched my skills as a writer. It also made me kill my darlings! Don’t worry, I won’t share any spoilers, for those who haven’t read it. This was an amazing exercise as a writer! Thank you to all of you who read along!

Writing-wise things were humming along, I was querying, writing McKinley Park and then everything ground to a halt for an unexpected and life-changing surgery. After surgery, it seemed that all of my bandwidth was used just keeping my professional and student life going, and at times I felt like I was barely keeping my head above water. What I did not expect, nor prepare for was the emotional cost of my operation. It was like a grenade going off in the middle of my life, I feel like I am still picking pieces of emotional shrapnel out of my skin. For most creative people who have been through a life-changing event, they can tell you, your creativity takes a hit too. I wasn’t prepared for that either.

For the first time in a long time, I didn’t want to write. I tried to force it, and that did not go well. I was terrified that I had somehow broken that special creative part of myself. Then one night I dreamt about all of the characters I had created and as woo-woo as this sounds, I felt like they were encouraging me to try again. I knew that creatively I couldn’t start something new, I wasn’t there yet, so I rewrote my first book- the project that made me fall in love with writing. I thought this would be an easier lift, as I didn’t really have to create much, the world was built, and the characters were there… Again, I was mistaken. Rewriting is HARD, but it was exactly what I needed to get back on my feet. Like a muscle that had atrophied, my rewrite started off slowly and then as time went on, my writing got stronger.

As November came around and NaNoWriMo kicked off, I tackled it with the same enveloping enthusiasm that I always had. I love Nano, but between school, work, and a renewed querying effort, I just didn’t have the bandwidth- something had to give. I refused to look at the truth of the situation, I could do a few things really well, or all of the things I was trying to accomplish poorly. Querying demands your very best, you can’t phone that in, neither can you do a half-assed job working on your Master’s degree. To top it all off, what started as a great idea for my Nano, fizzled and then eventually came to a grinding halt. The story just didn’t work. I had another idea on the back burner and I enthusiastically set to work on that, and the writing went well but I simply just did not have the bandwidth. Recognizing my own limitations, I stepped back from Nano for the first time ever. That was painful.

With the end of the year less than a month away, I have started another project! One evening while I was driving home from work I had an idea for another novel. This wasn’t a moment, where I thought to myself “oh that’s an interesting idea,” no this was a sledgehammer of an idea, more like “WRITE ME NOW OR I WILL CUT YOU!” The force in which the idea came was powerful. It was welcome! It was my inspiration, roaring to life! So I’ve started writing this book, with Joe and Noelle and I am telling their story. I don’t know exactly where it goes yet but I have a pretty good idea. Do you want to know what the best part is? I am having fun writing again! Even more important, the feeling that writing is a necessary part of my life is back! I could not be happier to get started with this. If you are asking yourself, about the bandwidth thing dear reader, all I can say is two words Christmas break. I am on Christmas break from grad school, I now have the bandwidth to dedicate all of me to this project and I could not be happier.

My hopes for the next year is to find an agent for The Lake Michigan Affair and to continue writing. I am excited about the possibilities a new year brings! I am also grateful for the good and difficult times this past year has brought. Life is a learning experience, and I have learned a lot this year!