Jacqueline C. Thomas - Romance Novelist

McKinley Park

How to Get to Know your Characters

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Getting to know your characters should seem like the easiest thing in the world to do for an author, after all, you’ve created them. I have seen a lot of questions asked lately in the Twitter Writing Community about how to get to know your characters. I believe that you can have the best plot in the world that draws readers in, but if the characters are well-rounded and fleshed out the whole work will flop. I want to share my tips on how I do my best to create vibrant characters.

I am not a planner. When I start writing a novel, I don’t have the plot all mapped out. I usually have a loose idea of the climax and I build the story out around it. Next, come the characters. Like the narrative, I usually have a loose idea of who they are. I imagine them, with just the basics and I begin to write. It is during the writing process for me that I begin to hear their voice come through in the writing.

For example, look at Ben and Rachel in McKinley Park. I knew Ben was a police detective and I wanted Rachel to be a single mom. I started with the most basic aspects of who they are. After a few chapters, I can begin to see their voice and this influences more of who they are. When I started McKinley Park, I didn’t know Ben was one of three brothers, like Rachel’s boys. As I wrote their fist date and needed the two connect this idea spoke to me.

It is usually around chapter 3 or 4 that I really begin to get to know my characters. It is at this time that I pause for what I call a character interview. I know this sounds nuts but I swear it changed my writing for the better. I basically interview the character asking questions like:

What is your favorite food?

Where did you grow up?

What was your home life like?

What is your favorite feature about yourself?

(Because I write Romance) Why do you love X?

What do you do for fun?

I ask these sorts of questions of my characters and I walk away knowing them much more intimately. I am able to continue writing on in the project really knowing who my characters are. I know their likes and dislikes, some of their past and a lot more.

In the first book I ever wrote, I dreamed the story first so my imagination had already done the work for me of physical appearance. I find that for me, physical appearance usually comes in later. In McKinley Park, I had a rough idea of what Rachel looked like, slim, busty, with dark brown hair and green eyes, and soft, pink lips. Rhett, her ex, his appearance came to me very early. In the spirit of honest conversation, Ben’s physical appearance was a mystery to me through so much of the book. I kept asking him, what do you look like? No joke, it wasn’t until the last few chapters that I got an idea of what he looks like. Physical appearance is not the easiest for me and it is a common criticism that I hear from my beta readers. I am trying to work on my interview questions to include more of this information so I can get a better idea of what they look like.

I also like to imagine my characters in different situations outside of the plot. I like to imagine what their reaction would be. For example, what would Rhett do if one of his son’s puked in his fancy car? What would his reaction be? I love this exercise, I feel like not only do I get to know the character better but it is like cake for my imagination, yummy and indulgent. I find that I do this best right before I fall asleep. I set the scene and let my character loose as I drift off to sleep. Seriously, try it, it is awesome!

There are lots of ways to get to know your characters. Make the time to do it, your work will be so much stronger for it. Try your best to take yourself out of the equation and let them speak, you might be surprised at what they have to say. I know I have been for sure in the past! I have included a few links below of good resources for getting to know your characters. Take a look. Fellow writers if you have any tips or tricks getting to know your characters please share with the class in the comments.

 

https://www.writinglaraferrari.com/101-character-questions

https://rachelgiesel.com/blog/how-to-really-get-to-know-your-characters-a-questionnaire

https://www.livylynnblog.com/2017/11/03/questions-get-know-character-cheat-sheet/.

 

 

 

McKinley Park Chapter 18

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“Have a great day honey. Good luck with school today, boys!” Ben said after he kissed Rachel through the open driver’s side window.

Ben and Rachel had spent every available minute they had for the past month together. Ben had really gotten to know the boys, who adored him having around. Ben knew she was the one, and Rachel felt the same about him. They were crazy in love with each other. He waved as Rachel’s van pulled out of her driveway. He watched her car turn around the corner as he started off for his own vehicle.

“Ben, hold on a sec.” Ben turned around to Laura’s voice.

He had not seen much of Laura since he had started dating Rachel. She was usually knocking on his door, waving and flirting each time she saw him, but that had stopped. Laura did a little jog to catch up to Ben more quickly.

“Hi, Laura.” Ben gave a half-hearted wave.

“Hi, hey do you have a second to talk?” She stood with her hands on her hips. “It won’t take long.”

“Um, sure, what’s up?” Ben didn’t really want to talk to her.

“Hey, I know this isn’t my place but,  there’s some stuff you don’t know about Rachel and you really should. I know what this looks like, but you are newer on the street and after that dust-up with her ex a couple of months ago… I just don’t want you to walk into anything blind.”

Ben leant up against his car. As Laura continued.

“She is no victim. She’s just as bad as he is.”

“What do you mean? As bad as who?”

“Her Ex, with their sex parties and stuff. I mean look at the both of them, clean-cut, playing the perfect family. She had an affair, that is why he left her. There was always this other guy hanging around. I think it was his friend. It makes me sick. Look, I am not meaning to out her or anything like that. I just,” she reached out to touch Ben’s arm, he pulled away.

“Laura, I love Rachel very much. I think you have the wrong information. He ex is a monster.”

“No that’s just the thing, he isn’t. He was always nice to everyone on the block.”

“Most guys like that usually are. I have seen the police reports Rhett Lawson is not a good man.”

“Ask her about the other man that used come around when she was still married to Rhett. She was not as good to Rhett as she plays.”

“It wouldn’t matter to me, I love her. I should really get going to work.”

“Look you are a really sweet guy. I would just hate to see you get caught up in something because no one spoke up.”

“I have to go.”

“Okay, I am only trying to help.”

“Bye Laura,” Ben said as he got into his car.

The conversation plagued him the entire way to the station. He knew that Laura had always been sweet on him and maybe that is why she said what she did. Ben sat down at his desk and pulled Rhett’s file out of the drawer and reread it. The records did not read like Rachel was a willing participant. There weren’t any records for calls to the house about noise complaints or complaints of any kind. Ben tried to shrug it off. Laura’s information did not mesh with the story Ben knew.

Ben and Marty commandeered the station’s conference room that afternoon, laying out all of the victims the timeline of the crimes, and the evidence they had found. They both had the feeling that they had missed something, there had to be a piece of evidence that would find the killer, it was not possible to not leave a trace of physical evidence. There was not a single fiber, hair, or fingerprint left behind anywhere. The crime scenes were so clean, they had concerns that it might be the work of a crime scene tech.

By 10 pm. Ben and Marty were beyond exhausted and frustrated. All of the players from the game had solid alibis. They had searched through all of Danwood’s workers, as quietly as they could. Serena had been able to give a part of a description, in that the man was white, and the ring, but other than that, they didn’t have much to go on. Every registered sex offender with a record of violence, within one hundred miles of the city had been checked. Eventually, information about the ring was put out to the press, hoping someone would recognize it. They were able to draw it from Serena’s description and the brand marks on the victims. They had yet to get a hit from the public on the ring.

Marty looked at the pictures of the brand marks hung up on the wall.

“Hey take a look at this? These two brands look like they may be a different size. It is slight but possible.” Marty said

Ben got up and inspected the photos. It looked possible.

“Let’s pay the M.E. a visit,” Ben said.

A dispatch officer knocked on the door and poked her head inside.

“Hey, guys I just got a call that I think you might want. A woman just fought off an attacker who tried to abduct her from her apartment in Lakeview. She said he was dressed in all black.”

Ben and Marty looked at each other as both made for the door.

They pulled up to the woman’s apartment and walked past the officers standing in the hallway. They walked into Calle Carlson’s neighbor’s apartment to find her wrapped in a blanket sitting at the kitchen table. Her mascara had run down her cheeks in black streaks. Visibly upset, she looked up at Ben and Marty who introduced themselves.

“It was him, that perv that has been snatching women. I know it”

“What makes you think it was him?”

“Well, I don’t have men breaking into my apartment every day.”

“I was ready for him though. That fucker wasn’t grabbing me.”

“What do mean ready for him? Can you walk us through what happened tonight?”

“Well, I pay attention, you know. Girls have been showing up dead all over the city since spring. I read the paper, and watch the news. I teach kickboxing at the Northlane Athletic Club. I started taking extra precautions, carrying pepper spray, putting my keys in between my fingers when I walk out on the street, I don’t walk with my earbuds in, that sort of the thing.”

“That’s good. You’re smart. I wish more people paid attention like you did. Can you tell us what happened tonight?”

“I finished my last class at 8:45 and got the El home. It felt weird today like I was being watched. I couldn’t prove it but you know what I mean, just the feeling of being watched. I thought I was going nuts.

Anyway, when I got home tonight, there was an eerie feeling in the apartment, like I wasn’t alone. I know this sounds crazy. I called my best friend Viv, and kept her on the phone while I walked through my place, there was nothing out of the ordinary. I thought I was just paranoid. I hung up and started the shower. I got in and I thought I heard something. The pipes in this apartment are a mess so I keep a pipe wrench in the bathroom.

I slid out of the shower, leaving water running and grabbed the wrench. I hid behind the door. I was just getting ready to get back in thinking I was crazy when I saw him. He was dressed all in black. I spotted him through the crack in the door, he didn’t see me. He has brown eyes and is about as tall as I am. I am 5,9.” He walked in and I watched him standing in front of my shower curtain. I lunged and hit him as hard as I could with the wrench. He stumbled and I froze, so stupid. I told myself to run. I took off and he came after me.

He wrestled me down to the ground and I kicked the shit out of him. I realized I still had the wrench in my hand and I started hitting him with it as hard as I could. I split his glove on his left-hand open and saw a gold ring on his pinky, the kind that would leave a brand like news said. I am telling you guys, this is the guy. I started shouting at him “I see you. I see you!” He scrambled up to his feet and lunged at me again and I moved towards him to hit him again. He turned around and ran out of the apartment. I fought that fucker off! I am telling you this guy has got to be hurt. Aside from getting a beatdown with my pipe wrench, I really did kick the shit out of him. His face has got to be a mess. I scratched him too and pulled as much DNA as I could from that asshole. I ran to my neighbor’s house but he wasn’t home so I came here to the lady that lived next door and she called you guys.”

“Where is the wrench now?” Marty asked.

“Probably still on the floor in my hallway,” Calle said.

“Are you hurt? Do you need medical attention,” Ben asked.

“No, I don’t think so. I’ve been hit worse, it comes with the job. I do want to shower, even though I wasn’t raped he had his hands on my naked body and it just creeps me out. Can you guys get what you need from me so I can shower please?”

Calle had been strong till that point but Ben could see the cracks in her demeanour change.

“Our evidence tech is on her way, we will have her collect evidence from you first. Are you sure you would not rather go get checked out at the hospital? You look like you could be hurt?”

“Did you hit your head at any point?” Janis Thorton the evidence tech asked as she walked in.

“I’m not sure, it happened fast.”

“Hi, I am Janis, I am the evidence tech. You should probably have a doctor look at you to be safe.”

“Okay, if you think it is necessary.”

“Better safe than sorry,” Ben said.

“I don’t want an ambulance and all of that fuss. Can we just go in a cab?”

“I can drive you,” Ben said.

“Would you mind if I came with you Calle,” Janis asked. “Our team is combing over your apartment right now. I would like to collect the physical evidence rather than have the hospital do it.”

“Okay.”

Janis showed Calle to Ben’s unmarked car as Ben stopped into the apartment quickly to let Marty know where he was going. There was blood on the hardwood floor in the hallway.

“We have hair!” a tech shouted out. “It’s blonde.”

“Any chance it could be someone else, other than our guy’s?” Marty asked.

“I doubt it. We’ll run it, I’d put money on this being the guy though.”

Ben dropped Calle at her friend Viv’s house after the hospital. He had a squad car parked outside of the friend’s apartment for her piece of mind, and his. Ben wasn’t sure if the man would come back and finished what he had started, he doubted it but who knew what the monster was capable of. Marty was still at the scene, but they were wrapping up too. There was a ton of physical evidence around the apartment, fingerprints, hair and blood. There was also a partial bloody boot print. Calle had given a description of the man that sounded very similar to Serena’s account.

Ben called Marty on the way back to the station. He wanted to take down a few notes while they were fresh in his head. Ben typed up his notes and went back into the conference room to look at the evidence they had laid out. The killer didn’t have a type of woman he preferred, they were all races, all young,  and all pretty. That was the only thing they had in common, was they were upper-middle-class and lived in or around the city. Ben thought it was interesting that Calle had said she felt like she had been watched. Ashley, from Skokie, had actually been watched. Stephen Duke had planted the camera. He’s pay Serena a visit first thing tomorrow morning.

Ben sat in one of the chairs around the table and looked at the wall of evidence. Marty walked in looking just as tired as Ben felt.

“Anything new?”

“A lot of DNA. He had to have been in the apartment for a while. You said you questioned her about a boyfriend?”

“She said she hasn’t had a man in the place in a couple of months, not even the super.”

“I know it’s a long shot but my gut says it’s him,” Marty said

“Yesh, it sounds like our guy.” Ben agreed.

Ben rubbed his forehead.

“What?” Marty asked knowing Ben was thinking about something.

“You know who else is blonde and wasn’t seen at his usual haunts tonight? I made some phone calls when I got back here. His car was spotted on by a red light camera crossing Lincoln and Halstead.”

“Rhett Lawson? That’s four blocks from Callie’s!”

“What do you say we go say hello, see what his face is looking like tonight?”

“Why don’t I just go? It’s not great for you to be knocking on his door at almost midnight with everything going on with Rachel and all.”

“You’re right, but I am going. If it is him, I want to be the one to put the cuffs on that fucker.”

Marty looked at the wall of evidence as he thought it over.

“Alright, let’s go.”

Ben and Marty pulled up to Rhett’s Lincoln Park townhouse just after midnight. Ben was happy to knock on his door. He wanted Rhett to be the killer so badly. He pounded loudly.

“Hey man, maybe I should do the talking.” Marty chimed in.

“Hopefully his face will do the talking.”

Ben pounded again, as the entryway light turned on.

Rhett opened the door in athletic shorts and a t-shirt. The only thing on his face was a layer of stubble.

“What the hell? It is after midnight? What the hell do you want?”

“Sorry to disturb you Mr. Lawson.”

Before Marty could continue Rhett recognized Ben.

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me! I know who the fuck you are. This is police harassment. I am calling my lawyer.”

“Mr. Lawson..” Marty started again.

“Fuck off pigs!” Rhett said as he started to shut the door.

“Where were you tonight Rhett?” Ben asked.

“Fucking Rachel, where were you? She begged me for every minute of it too.”

Marty moved in between the two men before Rhett slammed the door. Ben walked briskly to the car as Marty followed.  Ben slid into the driver’s seat as Marty got in. He drove away calmly until he pulled onto Lake Shore Drive. Once they got onto the Drive, Ben hit the sirens and lights, as he put his foot down hard.

“He was fucking with you man. Rachel would never sleep with him.”

“Not of her own will.” Ben gritted out through his teeth.

When a Writer Can’t Write It is Painful!

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McKinely Park is written, and I am at the end of my last edit for The Lake Michigan Affair. I am in the weird part of writing where I am not actively working on a new project. I have hit this awkward space before, the space between projects when you aren’t writing. I am also on the home-stretch of my Master’s degree in PR. Ths particular sememster is covering descriptive statistics, and it is making me crazy. I knew that I would need all of my attention focused on this semester, and I was so right! I am getting buried this semester.

I chose to be in this strange space, not writing, but let me tell you, it is uncomfortable. I just knew I wouldn’t have the bandwidth to work my full-time job and start a new project. I feel the urge to write down in my bones. I want to be dug into a project, getting to know my characters and working through the plot. Early next month I will undergo substantial surgery. I have been told to expect a long recovery. Knowing this, I am also hesitant to start a project knowing that not feeling well enough to write will not be good for my recovery and mental health. These aren’t excuses, I am just trying to be realistic about my time and abilities.

So what is a girl to do? Writers have to write. In the meantime, I am trying to fill this void by reading romance. It is the genre that I write in so I try to read a lot of it. While I am enjoying th book I am currently reading, Fat Tuesday by Sandra Brown, it is not writing. It is the strangest thing to describe, but it feels physically uncomfortable to not be working on a new project. I feel like something is missing from my life right now, and I don’t like the feeling.

I consider myself very lucky that as far as inspiration goes, I have never had to struggle to find the next thing to work on. I have a few ideas written down and I have been trying to mull them over and really develop them right now as a consolation prize. I am used to getting to know my characters by forcing them through the plot. They are born out of strife, and like a diamond produced under pressure, I’d like to think my characters are born the same way, although not as perfect as a diamond for sure. I live for this struggle, getting to know who my characters are. I love writing a chapter and then staying awake all night in a half-sleep knowing I am going to have to rewrite because I have forced my will as the author, not listened to the character.

Not writing has been weighing heavy on my mind. I keep wondering to myself about atrophy. If writing is described as a muscle, then what happens when you aren’t writing? I know I have improved considerably from the first novel I wrote. As my writing has matured, so has the process in which I write. Right now as I type this, I know I am at least a month out from being able to start my next project, and that fills me with despair. I want to write! I need to write!

In the meantime, I will continue to read, and really throw myself into my grad school course. Coming to this realization I will try to read instead, I put a call out to the Writing Community on Twitter for recommendations good romance reads. I was thrilled to see that my feed was filled with all sorts of romance novels. I am looking forward to digging into them while I recoup, but no matter how amazing these works are, it is not writing.

What do you do when you are a writer who can’t write? This is so frustrating. Fellow readers have you ever went through something like this? What did you do to get through it?

McKinley Park Chapter 17

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Ben took a shower and made some lunch, stopping by his front window to check on Rachel’s house each time he walked past. He turned on the Cubs game but wasn’t interested, he was frustrated with Rachel. He understood her fear but, he also wanted her to trust him. He knew it was going to take time. He got up to take his plate back to the kitchen when he heard a knock at the door. He put the plate back on the coffee table and went to answer the door.  Rachel stood on the front porch.

“Okay, let’s go. If I don’t go do this now, I will chicken out.”

He could see how conflicted she was. He grabbed his keys off of the table next to the door and locked it behind him. They got into his car, the heat from the sun making it feel like a sauna. Rachel stayed quiet as they rode along. Ben reached out and laced his fingers over her hand and squeezed gently. She squeezed back.

“I am really proud of you.” Ben said softly.

Rachel gave him a half smile.

He picked up the hand that he held and pressed a kiss into her palm.

“Trust isn’t easy for me Ben. I’m scared.”

“I know and that is why it means so much to me that you are trusting me. I won’t let you down. Look, I hope the future sees us together, happy as a family, but if it doesn’t I will still protect you and the boys from Rhett and his family. I promise you. Your protection is not mutual with us having a relationship.”

“Thank you for saying that.”

 Twenty- five minutes later Rachel sat at Ben’s desk as an officer went over the paperwork with her. She felt safe sitting in Ben’s chair. Ben went to go get her a cup of coffee from the kitchen while she completed the paperwork. He didn’t want to hover and make her feel pressured by him. As he walked into the kitchen he saw Marty drinking a cup of coffee in the break room.

“I thought you were taking some time off?” Marty said, as he finished coffee.

“I am. I’m just here with Rachel. She’s pressing charges against Rhett, and petitioning for an order of protection for her and the boys.”

“That’s a big step for her. In the file there were a noticeable lack of charges filed by her, most were filled by the state on her behalf.”

“Yeah. This has got to stop.”

“I hear ya. You really love this girl, don’t you?”

“Is it that obvious?”

Marty laughed.

“If she is here filing, she really loves you too, you know,” Marty said as he crunched the paper cup in his hand and flung it into the trash can.

Ben tried not to smile.

“Hey I am glad you are here anyway. I wanted to let you know, Rhett’s alibi is solid for the night Serena was attacked and the rest of the nights we have. He wasn’t even in town for Serena. He was partying his ass off out on the coast.”

“Shit are you sure?”

“Yeah it all checks out. Sorry man. Don’t worry though, he isn’t off my radar. I get get the same read you do. He knows something.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Well we questioned him, and even with his attorney there, he was so cocky. There’s something about him, slimy. Be careful there, he’s got some powerful friends too.”

“I met his father this afternoon, when he came to get the bastard’s car. I didn’t like the look of him either.”

“Hey, have you asked Rachel about Rhett?”

“I tried. She shut down when I brought up their sex life. There is more there I know it. She just isn’t ready to tell me.”

“Would it help if I talked to her, I mean since the two of you are involved? It might be less uncomfortable for her?”

“Yeah maybe, but give it a day or two. She’s been through a lot. I know there is trauma there. It is like part of her is holding back and I think it has to do with that piece of shit.”

“Well give it some thought.”

“Did you get anymore information on Duke?”

“You mean did we find all of him?”

“Yikes, that bad?”

“This wasn’t a murder, it was a hit. Someone wanted to shut him up.”

“Danwood?”

“That would be my guess. I put a call into Yee to let him know what was going on. A bit of penance for last night.”

“Good call.  I should get back to Rachel. Keep me up to date?”

“Yeah. Enjoy your time with her.” Marty nodded out towards the main room where Ben’s desk sat.

Ben looked in that direction to see Rachel walking into the kitchen.

“All done.” She took a deep breath as she said it.

Ben walked over to her and put his arm around her. He kissed the top of her head.

“I am proud of you.”

She gave a half smile, the tension in her body radiated in the small space of the kitchen.

“Hi, I’m Marty. I am Ben’s partner.”

“Oh, it is nice to meet you. I am Rachel.”

“It is nice to finally meet you. Ben talks about you… a lot.”

“Uh oh, is that a good thing or a bad thing?”

“It’s a good thing. I am happy to see him happy. You two will have to come out with my wife and I sometime.”

“That would be fun. Thank you for the invitation.”

“We should get going.” Ben chimed in.

“It was nice to meet you, Rachel.”

“You too.”

“Call me if you get anything big?” Ben asked as they stepped out of the kitchen.

“You got it.” Marty patted him on the back.

Ben and Rachel walked out of the station. He opened the car door for her. Before she got in she reached out and hugged him tightly, laying her head on his chest. He brought his arms around her and held her close to him. They stood there on the sidewalk, with the car door open, in each other’s arms.

“Thank you.” Rachel said quietly.

She looked up at him after she said it. Ben caressed her cheek.

“Thank you for forcing me to be brave.”

“Honey you are making this choice, I would not force you to do anything.”

“No, I know, it was a figure of speech. You know it is so weird, I was so afraid to do this and now it is done and I am not afraid anymore. I thought I would feel awful afterwards but I don’t. As cliche as it sounds, I feel light, like a huge weight has been lifted. So thank you.”

“I am glad to feel that way. You are stronger than you know Rachel. You are not alone, I am here and I will always have your back.”

She leant up on her toes and kissed him. A few officers walking in began to hoot and holler at the two of them. Rachel stopped kissing Ben and buried her face in his chest, her face blushing. Ben gave them the finger as he laughed, the officers laughed in return. They both got into the car and Ben pulled away.

“I’m kind of hungry. Are you hungry?” Rachel asked.

“Well it is almost dinnertime, do you want to get something while we are out?”

“Sure.”

“What do you have a taste for?”

“Chinese?”

“That does sound good. Where do you want to go?”

“What about Happy House on Hasted?”

“My favorite. That sounds good to me.”

Ben and Rachel ate dinner, and had ordered enough food for leftovers for three days after. Ben pulled into his driveway and parked the car. Rachel leant over and kissed him. He wanted her. They both got out of the car, as he came around to her, she put her arms around him and kissed him again. The intensity of their interaction was almost inappropriate for being out on the street,  but they were shielded by the darkness of early evening. They kissed their way to his front door, as they both tripped over one of the stairs to the the front porch. Ben caught Rachel before they both fell.

He  fumbled with his keys in the door, never breaking away from her lips. He opened the front door and they spilled into the foyer, Ben closed the door behind them. Ben wanted to take her right there in the hallway, propping her against the wall.

“Ben wait.” Rachel said breathless. “We have to slow down a bit, please.”

She pushed him towards the couch. He sat as the back of his legs hit it.  She climbed on top of him and he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her and she kissed him back. He pushed her blouse off of her shoulder and kissed the exposed skin. Ben moved her hair out of the way and kissed her neck as he felt her hips move against him. She moaned as he kissed back down to her collar bone. He reached up and tried to undo more buttons on her blouse. She reached down to help him. He pushed it off of her shoulders and she helped but got caught by the buttons on the cuffs of her sleeves. Ben had went back to kissing her and had not noticed Rachel’s arms were caught in her sleeves. She began to panic, being trapped. He reached for her clasp at the front of her bra, as she still struggled to free her hands. Ben had been too eager and was moving too fast to notice.

“Stop! Please stop.” Rachel cried out.

Ben stopped right away, and noticed her arms were stuck. He looked at her face and saw she was on the verge of tears. She looked away embarrassed as Ben reached out to free her arms.

“I’m sorry honey, I didn’t notice you were stuck.”

Rachel brought her arms around to the front of her and got off of Ben’s lap. Ben stood up, as she stood in front of him, her arms across her body, sheilding her nakedness.

“Can I please have a glass of water?”

“Of course. Rachel I am really sorry.”

She nodded  and walked towards the kitchen, in only her bra and pants. Ben followed her and grabbed a glass of from the cupboard and filled it. He set it on the counter next to her. She picked it up and took a drink from it. Clutching the glass, she walked over to the large windows at the back of the kitchen. Ben stayed quiet, he wanted to give her the space she needed. He stood at the counter.

Rachel turned back around.

“Ben I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I’m sorry I didn’t notice you were stuck.”

“I shouldn’t have freaked out like that. I know you wouldn’t hurt me, it’s just that…” she stopped talking.

Ben walked across the kitchen to her. He held out his hand and she took it. He pulled her in to him, slowly. He wrapped his arms around her, his warm skin on her cool back felt wonderful to her.

“Rachel you can tell me anything, nothing will change the way I feel about you.”

“Can we go upstairs to your bed?” She took a step towards the stairs.

“Yes, but wait,” he reached out for her hand. “We don’t have to sleep together if you don’t want to.”

She cut him off.

“Ben I want to, I really want to. I just needed to calm down. Can I ask a favor?”

“Anything.”

“Can we just go slow? I just have a hard time moving too fast. I need to stay in the moment, and going slow really helps.”

“Of course.”

Rachel kept ahold of Ben’s hand and walked upstairs with him. She let go of his hand once they got into his bedroom and walked over to the bed. The room was dark, with only the light from the street light outside to illuminate the room. Rachel undid her bra as Ben could see the yellow light from outside reflecting off of her perfect breasts. She undid her pants, her back to the wall where Ben could not see. As she slipped them off Ben followed her lead and began to undress. She slid into the bed completely naked and he followed suit.

She scooted over to him, meeting him in the middle of the bed. He wrapped his arm around her, and kissed her gently. He reminded himself to go slow, pay attention to her body and not to touch her ass or the back of her thighs. The more he kissed her the more he felt the tension ease from her and her body began to respond in a pleasurable way.

Ben kissed down her chest again and took one of her nipples into his mouth as he spread out his hand on her stomach an slowly moved it downward. Rachel ran her hands though Ben’s hair. He loved the feeling of her fingers in his hair. His hand inched lower, as he moved his mouth back to hers. He kissed her gently as his hand made it’s way to it’s destination. Ben cupped her most sensitive spot and paused watching for any signs of hesitation. He felt her hips buck towards him and he took the invitation, still moving slowly, paying attention to her body. He  slid his fingers inside of her slowly, and she began to ride his fingers. It took everything in Ben not to come undone, it was so simple but so incredibly sexy at the same time. He looked at Rachel in the lamp light, in pleasure, and he kissed her again.

She wrapped one arm around him and copied his movements as she took him into her free hand. Him sitting in her warm hand, while he continued to move on his hand inside of her, ignited a sense of urgency in him that he fought back. He wanted to make love to her, going slow savoiring it all.

“I have to grab a condom,” he whispered through gritted teeth.

If he didn’t pull away soon, he would be spent and this bliss would be over. He rolled over and opened the drawer on the nightstand. It was the fastest he had ever put a condom on in his life. He rolled back over to Rachel who embraced him again, with her arms and her tongue. He moved his body gently to move her onto her back, looking for any sign of hesitation. She rolled herself easily, and welcomed him into her body. As he pushed in, he was sure to go slow and make eye contact with her.

Her body was better than he had remembered it from the last time they had slept together, and he would have classified that as heaven. He could see the whites of her eyes in the lamplight as she looked at him. There was a connection there. He knew in that moment something special had happened. This was more than just sex for the both of them. Ben leant down and kissed her.

“Ben” she whispered, “Can I get on top?”

Ben slid his arm under back and rolled the both of them so she was now on top. He could see her smile at his skill. She began to ride him slowly. He ran his hands up her stomach and cradled her breasts. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He was getting close, and he fought it, he wanted this to be just as good for her, if not better. He reached up and brought her mouth to his, kissing her. That intense kiss was all she needed, Ben could feel her finish before he could hear her. She sat upright and grabbed his hands and put them on her hips as she continued to ride through the waves of her orgasm. She threw her head back as a moan from deep inside her escaped. Watching her on top of him, enraptured in pleasure, was more than he could fight off. His own orgasm came racing through his body, so intense he could feel his fingers tingle.

Ben was relieved he had made it that long. Sex with Rachel was the best sexual experience of his life. He never had to fight to stay in the game before, but there was something with her that was different. She laid down on top of him, resting her head on his shoulder as they both caught their breaths. He wrapped his arms around her back and moved them up to her face. He took her head into his hands and kissed her mouth.

“Rachel you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.” He kissed her again.

“I love you,” she said back to him after their kiss.

Taboo Sex: What is Society’s Safe Word?

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I spent last weekend with engrossed with Tiffany Reisz’s The Siren. It is supposed to be the work she is most known for. I adore her writing and while it is considered erotica, and it really is, the story is fantastic. I have read three of her books up until that point. The first book I read by her was The Red, it was steamy, but the story was amazing too. She just released another book earlier this year called The Rose. which was a masterclass in storytelling. She is an amazing storyteller, so I was eager to read her most well-known work, The Siren. 

Without giving too much away, the story in The Siren is what I would consider strong S&M. This is a story about the S&M lifestyle, something alien to me. Now, I just want to be very clear here, I am in no way making a judgment call on anyone’s preferences in the bedroom. As long as all who are participating are consenting, of age adults, then all the power to them. I really tried to understand the love, and lust in this type of relationship, but I really struggled with it. 

When Fifty Shades of Grey came out, I remember people being shocked by the “rough stuff.” I have heard the joke that if Christian Grey had been poor, the book would have had a very different slant. Full disclosure, I haven’t read the series, but the whole thing got me thinking about taboo sex, romance writing, and erotica writing. There is something fun about writing the taboo, the forbidden, and the unorthodox. As I continued to think about that, two big stories broke, the Jeffery Epstein story and R. Kelly being brought up on Federal charges. Both cases dealt with older men and underage girls. 

I just want to be very clear, I am not making a connection to S&M play and sleeping with underage girls. It is strange what makes people “tick” sexually. Adult entertainment is filled with images, and videos of women as close to the required age of consent as possible. One of the sexiest romance novels I ever read was between an older man and an 18-year-old girl. It just got me to wondering if pushing the boundaries in writing sex is a responsible thing to do?

I am not saying that in R. Kelly’s case or Epstein’s case that they read a romance novel with taboo sex and it influenced them, that would be ridiculous. It just made me ask questions. As I said earlier, as long as all parties are of age, not coerced, not getting hurt and are willing parties, then all the power to them, to experience intimacy how they chose. The question I found myself asking, is what classifies sexual behavior as taboo and what part does writing sex play in that?

I mean think, twenty years back, S&M was a taboo topic. If you told me then about the success of Fifty Shades, I would have said you were nuts, no way that would ever be mainstream. What classifies sex as taboo? I do think there are some clear lines, like sex with underage participants, and sex where people get hurt, are no goes. That being said, take my current work McKinley Park into account, the subplot is about a murder and a rapist. Rape is a taboo subject. Many feel that it should not be written about at all, that writing about it glorifies it. I respectfully believe it is about framing it, is the subject written to glorify or denounce. 

I am all for sexual expression, period. I just wonder with erotica becoming more mainstream, which I support, does it continue to push the line of acceptable versus taboo? Is that a good thing? What do you think? If you write sex, do you think you hold some responsibility in this discussion? I would be interested in knowing what you think. Let me know in the comments below!

 

McKinley Park Chapter 16

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Ben led Rachel upstairs to her room, the front window of her room faced, his bedroom window across the street. He pulled back the quilt as she turned off the lamp on the nightstand. She slid off the robe underneath, a long, grey, silk slipcovered her body. Ben turned the light back on, and she looked at him surprised. The light showed the deeply colored bruises on her upper back and arms.  Rachel tried to cover the bruises on her arms, ashamed. Ben ran his fingertips over the bruise on her left shoulder blade.

“Ben.” She whispered.

He lent down and kissed the bruise, and then the one next to it, kissing every visible bruise he could see. She turned around and faced him, running her hand over his cheek.

“You are so beautiful Rachel. This is the last time you will ever have marks on your body like this.”

He leaned in and kissed her mouth, her kiss reaching into his chest and warming his heart.

He pulled away gently and grabbed the blankets pulling them further back as she took the prompt and climbed in. He pulled the blankets up over her. He reached over and switched off the lamp. Rachel reached out for him.

“Please stay?”

Ben slid off his shoes and his dress shirt. He made sure to lock his gun in his holster and he hung it high on one of the posters on the bed, where Luke could never reach it. The boy would literally have to climb on top of Ben’s head, yet it was close enough for Ben to use if needed.  He slid into the bed next to Rachel. He pulled her close as he draped his arm over her.  She didn’t want to lay on her side but, laid on her back next to him. She held onto his arm wrapped across her torso. He wanted to ask her about Rhett, about the abuse, Rhett’s past. Ben knew Rhett was involved somehow in the Southside Strangler case, he could feel it in his gut. Ben had learned that there was no such thing as a coincidence in his line of work.

Ben woke to the sound of a lawnmower, he opened his eyes, the morning light poured into the bedroom. He looked over at the bed where Rachel had slept and it was empty. He looked up to see his gun where he had left it and breathed a sigh of relief that Luke had left it alone. His phone chirped, letting him know there was a message. It was the Captain.

“Ben this is Cap. I need to see you in my office first thing this morning. We have to talk about last night with Mr. Lawson. 9:30 See you then.”

“Shit,” Ben said under his breath. He knew what was coming, he was going to be pulled off of the case if Rhett was a real suspect. He sat up, still feeling tired from the night before, and sore. He grabbed his shirt off of the end of the bed, he’d go home and freshen up before going in to meet the captain.

He came downstairs to the noise of another woman’s voice. He walked into the kitchen where Rachel’s sister sat, heavily pregnant, as Rachel scrambled eggs.

“So you must be the white knight and my hero. Hi, I am Becky. I am Rachel’s little sister.”

“Good morning.” Rachel turned towards Ben.

“Good morning. Nice to meet you, Becky. Where are the boys?”

“Luke is playing with Alex, Becky’s youngest on the back porch. Tommy and Evan are still asleep. Why?”

“I was just wondering. Hey, I have to go in this morning. I’m sorry, the Captain called. But we have to talk when I get back.”

“Are you in trouble for last night?” There was concern in Rachel’s voice.

“I don’t know, it doesn’t matter, it was worth it. Will you be home later to talk?”

“Yes.”

Ben put a hand up to wave goodbye to Becky as he walked out of the kitchen and into the dining room. He heard Rachel coming up behind him.

“I’ll walk you out.” She said, with a concerned look on her face.

Ben and Rachel stepped out onto the front porch. In the sunlight, Ben could see the faintest outline of a bruise on her cheek. He reached up and slid his thumb across it, and she winced in pain.

“Sorry.” He said not meaning to hurt her.

“Ben, I just wanted to thank you for last night. About later, it’s okay, I get it. This is a lot, I get it if you don’t want to do this after all. I don’t want you to risk your career.”

Ben pulled Rachel in close to him, wrapping his arms around her tightly and kissed her with everything he had in him. She pulled away breaking the seal of the kiss first, after taking a long fill first.

“Whoah, what was that for?” She asked wiping her lip, sounding embarrassed.

“None of this is too much to be with you. I see guys like Rhett everyday. You are worth it Rachel, you are so worth it.”

“I thought when you said you wanted to talk later…”

“I wanted to talk later about the next steps to putting an end to this. There will be no next time, this was the last time he will ever hurt you or the boys. I will be back around 11:30, let’s talk when I get back. I should get back here before he has made bail. If he gets back here before I do, do not under any circumstances answer the door or let him in. Call me or the police before you think you need to. I will be back as quickly as I can.”

Ben crossed the street where he had parked his car the night before. He opened the door to get in when he heard Rachel.

“Are you sure?” She yelled.

“Sure of what?”

“I’m worth it?”

“Never been more sure in my life.”

Ben watched a big smile spread across Rachel’s face and it felt wonderful that he had put it there, especially after the night before. He put his phone in the cup holder and went to shift the car into gear when he saw Rachel next to his window. He rolled it down and she leant in and kissed him.

“Come back home, I will be waiting for you.”

Ben walked into the station, still in the clothes from the day before, and stubble on his chin. Marty was waiting for him.

“Whoah, nice nose job. Lawson really did try to rearrange your face last night.” Marty jabbed.

“Please tell me the fucker hasn’t made bail.”

“No way, with his record, and assault of a police officer, a snowball’s chance in hell. I have more news though. Duke showed up this morning.”

“Where?”

“Half buried in the dump on 97th. Pretty ugly too, let’s just say not all of him is there.”

“Shit.”

Ben walked towards the door as Marty put his hand out to stop him.

“You know what you are walking into, right?”

“Yeah, is it official?”

“Lawson may be a piece of shit, but he is a connected piece of shit.”

Ben knew it was coming.

“Go in, take your punishment like a good boy and for what it is worth, I would have done the same damn thing. Hopefully, you’ll get the girl though.”

“Yeah, I think I will.”

“Hey before I walk into this, you have got to look further into Rhett, he’s connected in this, I know it in my gut. I want to go back and talk to Rachel later, we didn’t get a chance last night. I did see his hands though, no burn marks.”

“Got to examine them real close, I see.” Marty joked. “You got it. I will look into him, this guy won’t have any secrets when I am done with him.”

“Thanks. Keep me in the loop if you can?”

“Of course.”

Ben walked out of the station forty-five minutes later off of the case, for now. With Rhett possibly being a real suspect, Ben couldn’t be anywhere near the case.  Leave for a couple of days the Captain called it, but nothing official.  Ben took the leave, he wanted to be around for Rachel. Ben pulled up in front of Rachel’s driveway, where Rhett’s Mercedes still sat in the driveway. He made sure to let the Captain know the car was still parked in the driveway before he left the station as well.

Ben walked in the front door, announcing his arrival.

“Hello? Anybody home?” He knew they were, the front door was open.

Rachel came down the stairs, a smile on her face at seeing him.

“You are done early. You didn’t get fired did you?”

“No. I took some time off.”

She looked at him sceptically.

“That sounds a lot like fired to me.” her tone was sarcastic.

“I was practically promoted, but I am taking a few days off. It happens from time to time. Where are the boys?”

“They went home with Becky. I didn’t want them here if Rhett came to get the car himself.”

“Good call. I’ll be here.”

Rachel yawned. “I’m so sorry about all of this.”

“I’m not. Rachel, stop apologizing for his mistakes. It is time this stops, you deserve so much more, so do your boys.”

“He doesn’t like me moving on, even though we have been divorced for three years now.”

“It’s about possession with guys like that, it’s not love, it’s control.”

“You are right.”

“Did you tell him about us last night?”

“No, Tommy did. I know he didn’t mean anything by it. How was he to know how Rhett would react? I wasn’t expecting him. He just walked in like he still lived here. Tommy said, joking around, “mom has a new boyfriend.” He meant it as a joke, and Rhett went nuts. I told the boys to go up to Tommy’s room and put on a movie. They fled from the table leaving their half-eaten dinners, I didn’t want them to see that. The kids didn’t make it out of the kitchen before he started this time. This has got to stop. I don’t want my boys to see that. They aren’t babies anymore. It isn’t so easy to hide it anymore. How did you find the boys?”

“They were outside, along the side of the house. I came to peek in the backdoor when I didn’t see you. I knew something was not right. Every light in your house was on at almost 11 pm on a weeknight and your van was parked in the driveway. My gut said you were here. I just wanted to make sure you are okay. I spotted the boys as I came around the side of the house.”

“They were so scared. When I divorced, I petitioned for sole custody but Rhett’s family hired expensive lawyers, even with the documented abuse, he still got joint custody. He told me afterwards that if I wanted to keep the boys, I needed to stay single, that was the deal, that I would always be his.”

“What?”

“ I know that is crazy.”

“No, he said you would always be his? Were those his exact words?”

“I don’t know, something like that. Why?”

“I need to ask you some questions about Rhett? Has he always been violent?”

“No, he wasn’t when we first met. He was Prince Charming when we first met. He came from a good family, and we were crazy about each other.”

“When did the abuse start?”

“After Tommy was born. He has always had a temper. The first time he ever hit me, I had Tommy in my arms. A lot changed in our marriage around then. I went to his mother and showed her the bruises. She told me that sometimes that is a price that is paid for such a charmed life and to not upset him, that it would pass. I was dumb enough to believe her. I kept it from everyone, even Becky. He would apologize each time promising it would never happen again, but it just got worse and worse..”

“I hate to ask you this, but has he ever been violent in the bedroom, when you were together.”

“Ben I don’t want to talk about that.”

“I’m sorry, there is a reason aside from us that I am asking, I promise.”

Rachel’s demeanor changed. She had gone from calm to agitated.

“Ben, please don’t ask me about that, please.”

“It is important.”

“Ben, I can’t. I just can’t talk about that.”

Ben took a deep breath.

“Do you think he could be violent with other women in the bedroom?”

“What kind of question is that? Ben I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” Rachel stood up and walked out of the living room.

Ben had struck a nerve. He got up and walked into the kitchen. Rachel’s back was to the door as she looked out of the window over the sink.  A car door slammed outside and she jumped.

“He’s here to get his car.”

“I will deal with this. When he leaves we are going to file a restraining order for you and the boys and you are going to have to press charges.”

Ben walked out of the kitchen and onto the front porch. An older man who looked like Rhett stood on the first step. It had to be his father, Ben thought.

“Can I help you, Sir?”

“I am looking for Rachel, I am her father-in-law.”

“She isn’t in. Is there something I can help you with?”

“Ah, you must be the cop that worked my son over last night.”

“Is there something I can help you with Mr. Lawson?” Ben said cutting him off.

“No, I just came by to get my son’s car and to say hello to Rachel and my grandsons.”

“I will be sure to tell them you stopped by.”

Mr. Lawson Sr. looked at Ben with a look that could be lethal. Rhett may have been an uptight shit that liked to knock his ex-wife around but there was something about Lawson Sr. that Ben knew was dangerous. He could feel it radiate off of the man. Mr. Lawson walked over to Rhett’s car and got into it as the car that had dropped him off pulled away. Another Mercedes with tinted out windows. His dad pulled out of the driveway and peeled away down the street, barely stopping at the stop sign at the end of the block.

Ben turned around and walked back into the house. Rachel stood at the top of the stairs and watched Ben come back in.

“If you think Rhett is scary, Andrew is terrifying. He normally doesn’t come over. It cannot have been good that he was here.”

“I was here, he is not above the law.”

“Ben they are going to try and take the boys away from me.”

“Come on, we are going to go file those protection orders right now. I had them drawn up before I left, all you have to do is sign them.”

“If I sign them Ben, they are going to take the boys, I know it.”

“Not with Rhett’s record, no way a judge will take your boys out of your house and put them with Rhett.”

“No, you don’t understand.”

“Rachel, help me understand. You can trust me.”

“When I had Rhett served with papers, I didn’t give a warning. I took the boys out of town. Becky and her husband came with me. Rhett called me and made all sorts of threats. I turned my phone off and tried to go on with the weekend for the boys. I don’t know how they found me, but Andrew turned up at the cabin we rented in Wisconsin. I mean we were on a lake in the middle of nowhere. He told me that if I didn’t go home and make things right with Rhett, that I would never see the boys again. Jack, Becky’s husband got in the middle of it, and Andrew backed off when he realized I wasn’t there alone.

I went home and stayed with Becky and Jack for about a week, while I worked with my lawyer. I had an order of protection put in place. Andrew came to see me and told me that If I kept the boys from Rhett, I would spend the rest of my life in prison. That he would plant drugs in my car, my classroom and the house. I would be looked at as an unfit mother, he would find drug dealers to say I had traded sex for drugs. I was terrified. I told my lawyer, she had pictures of the bruises and the police reports. She told me to drop the order to keep the peace, and just play nice until the divorce was final.”

“What? What kind of attorney advices that?”

“One that my ex-Father- in- law pays off. Ben, I am terrified that they are going to take the boys. Rhett doesn’t really want them, he only wants them because he knows I won’t let them go. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he loves them, but he isn’t interested in raising them.”

“That will not happen. Come on, let’s go get all of this document. Believe me, Andrew Lawson’s power only goes so far.”

“Are you so sure of that? Because you are risking my boys if you are wrong.”

“I would never put your sons harm’s way.”

Ben held grabbed her hand gently.

“Documentation is key to all of this, trust me. I won’t let anything happen to you or the boys.”

“Ben, can I think about it? I don’t want to be pushed into this.”

“I’m not meaning to push. I’m sorry. I just know this is how this works. I am trying to help you and the boys.”

“Ben stop, please just stop.” She took a deep breath. “I need to lay down for a while, I am exhausted. I cannot think straight.” She turned to walk up the stairs and Ben followed her. She stopped and turned around. “ I would like to be alone, please.”

Ben tried not to look hurt. He was only trying to help her.

“Of course.”

Rachel turned around and walked upstairs. Ben suddenly felt like he didn’t belong in the house anymore. He locked all of the doors and then went across the street to his house. Felix was waiting for him at the door, meowing for food as Ben walked in.

“Sorry man, let me get you some food.” Ben bent down to pet the cat.